Rick and Joan here....It's a boy!!!

Just got the news a few minutes ago........We are grandparents again! No. 9. We are so thrilled....little Remi Jorge born to Roger and Ella May 28th , at 12:02 am. 7lbs 4 0z, 21 inches long. This is so exciting!!!! We are off to the hospital first thing in the morning to hug and squeeze this little miracle!!!!!

Rick here...You can’t tell where the roses bloom!

Today was a very emotional, shitty day! I woke up feeling very, very stressed. Dying sucks! We have our 9th grandchild coming any moment, my wife lies beside me twitching in her dreams and snoring (okay ---this is where the violins are suppose to start playing…and here I am typing this for Rick –not fair! The snoring part that is!!!)

All I can think of as I see the sun streaming through the window is how much I want to be here for Joan, the kids, the grandkids, for mom and dad and for me. God this is hard! I know the medical realities; I feel the changes in my body. I just don’t want this to happen. It is a tough day…tomorrow will be better, I trust.

I found out that Dunn-rite, Sperling Welding, and many others from the Sperling area , and even one of our competitors in our industry donated to the ALS walk. I was overwhelmed that people who I have never given anything to donated to this cause on my behalf. It is so damn humbling for me!!! I am so thankful!

We went out for a stroll and supper in my wheel chair tonight. We came in to the restaurant outdoor patio area and a chair was in the way. A lady noticed it and jumped up and came over and cleared the chair away so we could get to a table. Small kindnesses mean the world when you are especially in a spot like I am in right now. I had forgotten my cane and was making my way from our table to the bathroom without it. (slow, slightly stumbling, damn sad) and this biker looking guy stopped and held the door for me for about a minute till I got there…I thanked him, and he smiled and said “no problem, bro”. Little did he know how much dignity that gave me at that moment! You can’t tell where the roses bloom!

Appearances don’t matter a damn! That is what growing up in a small town has taught me. The measure of a person is not based on their net worth or appearance but on their character and heart! That is my heritage of being raised in Sperling! My friends from Sperling have proved that!!

While sitting at the Pony Corral, on St. Mary’s Ave. with Joan tonight having supper,
I looked over and saw the bluest sky and the grayest buildings and started to cry. I thought Heaven must be wonderful…look how beautiful the earth is…there is a God!

I also realized that I am not a writer. I am a narrator. I need a mic so I can just speak into it. Otherwise I have to think too much to be happy with what I am writing. I guess when I talk; I feel like I can correct it or elaborate on it in the next sentence. Writing is just too damn precise. Precision was never my strong point. I am more of a shot gun aficionado than a marksman. Kind of funny that my Dad, my brother Garth, and my son Daniel are all marksmen…kind of think Grandpa Fewster and Grandpa Watson were shot gun guys themselves. That may be only my impression because I got along with them so well...but then again I might be the odd ball. Lol They say characteristics jump a generation. So who knows?

We have found that on the hardest days often we experience the most unexpected mercies from the most unexpected people. A young man saw us moving towards the elevator as he came off…the elevator door completely closed…he saw us coming…he stopped and turned around and went out of his way to push the elevator up button and held the door open while Joan pushed me on. We have found that a lot of the young people from the other countries have much compassion and respect for the disadvantaged and old. (HELL that is me now!)

Anyhow…I think I am entering into a new level of blogging in terms of being able to express my inner heart. Something happened to me at the walk…maybe a realization of what really makes a friend, I am not sure, but at any rate something really has happened to me.

I told Joan that I don’t want to die!
I don’t.
I am not afraid to. I just don’t want to now or anytime soon! This whole thing is just so damn hard!!!
Anyhow….more later…
Rick

"Team Rick" & "Team Sperling"

Rick and Joan here...ALS Walk a success!

It was a fantastic day! Sunny and warm to start off with.

We want to thank all our family, friends and the Whitemouth School students and teachers who participated in the walk in person and in spirit!

A special thank you to Diana and Sharon from the ALS Society, Jennifer from the Whitemouth school who coordinated the walk, Lorraine Forester who launched the whole idea, Kyla who organized "Team Rick", Kent and gang for "Team Sperling", Lorna for the "Team Rick" hats, Winnipeg Outfitters for the "Team Rick" tshirts, Dunnrite Foods for their sponsorship and prizes, Jake and Val for opening their home to all and the folks of Whitemouth.

The day was a tremendous success with the ALS Society raising over $13,000! Our granddaughter Tia won a prize for raising the most amount of the students.

The day started out with family and friends coming from all over. Stroller after stroller after stroller lined the sidewalks. lol We joked that we could have been called "Team Stroller".

For us there were so many variety of emotions of the day. We experienced such great joy in seeing people come out especially on the weekday and when Rick's old school mates showed up as a surprise to him "Team Sperling" wow!!! Then as we walked with everyone down the streets it was like what are we doing here...it just doesn't seem real sometimes!

Rick here....

I don't know how Joan and Kent did it. They kept me completely in the dark about the existence of "Team Sperling". I looked up and saw all these purple tshirts pouring out of a big van. I thought "that is neat there is another team here and I wonder who they are". Joan ran ahead of me and I heard her say you must be Kent. I am not often caught for words but when I saw all my old friends...most of whom I have not seen for 30 or 35 years. I lost it!!!

Some of these folks I had not seen since grade 8. I choked back the tears and tried to figure out who was who. I was completely overwhelmed! I was humbled and honoured all at the same time! What an incredible surprise and what an incredible group! What an incredible town!!!

Well...needless to say after the walk we retired to the good old Whitemouth Hotel to catch up on 35 years. It turned into a few hours. We laughed...and laughed...and told stories and laughed some more! What a time!!! We then moved the party over to the suite where we will be staying and spent most of the afternoon laughing and laughing and telling stories and did I say laughing!!!

A few highlights...seems the gang had picked up a big box of doughnuts on the way out to Whitemouth. As they parked the van right in front of the local RCMP detachment which is across from the school it only seemed right that the doughnut box be autographed and left on the front step of the cop shop!!! A short time later several of the guys got their picture taken with one of the officers. Quite a joke seeing that we spent a lot of our time in our teenage years avoiding those guys! Someone joked that it must be different to not have the cops taking the pictures! lol

Anyhow, it was one of the most memorable afternoons of my life! A big THANK YOU to Kent, Don, Rob, Don, Glenn, Gordie, Anne and Fritz, and Jill. I also want to thank Ruth and Jean out in Carmen for their help in the fund raising.

Joan here...I want to thank "Team Sperling" also for really making me feel welcome and accepted. Mercifully they kept all the "Rick" stories quite decent!!! :) All that laughing was so good for the soul!!! Thanks!!!

"Team Sperling"

Rick and Joan here.....Friday is coming!!!

On Sunday we were invited for a absolutely wonderful time back to our former home for a delicious meal, drinks and most of all the terrific hosts! We were very apprehensive about returning to our former home not knowing how we would deal with it all emotionally. To our wonder and amazement we walked in to the house and found it not ours! We felt so comfortable and welcomed. We truly are so grateful for the way Dave and Sheila have treated us through this transition. They have been gracious, sensitive and caring beyond belief!

When Rick and I walked around the yard pointing out the various plants etc. we think it was actually harder then going through the house. Probably being, the house was so different with their things in it but right now the yard is exactly the same. It is weird how we respond to familiar things! They seem to trigger so many memories!

Friday is soon coming!

We will be meeting Lorraine Forester and her family for the first time at the ALS walk in honour of her mom. We really look forward to it.

Also, we look forward to seeing all of you at our first ALS walk in Whitemouth as difficult as it will be emotionally due to the circumstances!!! Thank you to all who have so generously supported the walk and to those who will be able to make it to Whitemouth. Looks like we will have a sunny day if the weather person isn't telling lies! :)

Joan has had more practice handling the wheelchair now so we trust there will be no casualties, either me or innocent bystanders! :) I have discovered that these new fangeled shoes called "crocks" have really helped me to keep lighter on my feet. They are light and comfortable and don't tire me out so much as regular shoes. Joan and I have matching black ones now! :) The grand kids are suggesting neon colours though I think (you know what) will freeze over before I succumb to neon coloured shoes!!!

My folks are unable to attend due to their own health issues right now. We understand that those of you that can't make it in person are there in spirit. Thank you to all of you!

Will update when we return from good old Whitemouth.

Rick here...Some moments

Life is made up of moments. Here are a couple...

I was making my way in from the underground parking in the apartment we have rented for a couple of months. I was using my cane and struggling a bit as the doors are heavy and cumbersome now. Quick as a flash, a little old lady (and I do mean little and I do mean old) bounded up and said "Here, let me get that for you!" :) I kept a straight face and was thankful but as I carried on the reality of the whole thing hit me. Very weird! Life has sure changed!!!
As I tell Joan though...it won't be too long and these will be the "good old days". Agghhh!

Joan and I made our second excursion down to the library through Portage Place with the wheelchair. She is getting pretty expert at this. I never screamed once this time! LOL
We have a system worked out where I hit the wheel chair door opening buttons with my cane then she wheels us through. I think we are getting faster.

Everyone needs to be in a wheel chair for a day. You sure get a different perspective on what a lot of people have to deal with day by day. Humanity seems to fall into two main categories. Jerks and nice folks. This trip we had the nice ones. The library people actually looked and talked to me as a person. The waitress where we stopped for a beer and a snack did also. I think my faith in the general humanity of people may be on the rise again.

I have been very touched by the number of old friends from across the country who have tracked me down since this started. Many I have not seen for 20 or even 30 years! Yikes!!!
Thank you all so much!

Joan Here...The Mall Crawl

Well, we finally did it! Put Rick into the wheelchair for our first official trip to the mall. Talk about an eye opener!!! Two of our little grand daughters went along for the trip.

Try getting the wheel chair maneuvered in the elevator plus two kids plus do all that before the door closes...All I can say is poor Rick...he spent his time staring straight ahead at the elevator door with his back to us all. There wasn't enough time or room to turn the chair around before we were ready to get out.

As I pushed the wheelchair down the sidewalk I soon discovered some of the obstacles for a chair that we don't notice when just walking. My first discovery was the crack and unevenness of the sidewalk where I hit it straight on...and yeah...Rick almost went flying out again as I came to a dead stop hitting the raised part of the crack!!! After that I had to keep looking ahead for them. Next was looking for a sloping end of the sidewalk so I could change sidewalks.

When crossing the cross walk all Rick said he could see were the headlights of the cars staring straight at him. Just a bit scary I would think. Once we got to the mall, the gkids wanted to ride the escalator of course. So, I ended up parking grandpa at the end of the stairs and I rode up and down with the girls while he watched the fun.

The mall has three stories so I soon discovered the need for knowing where the elevators were located. Things we just don't usually even think about. At least I never did before. As I pushed Rick around in the chair I began feeling sadder and sadder and more tired as we went. I emotionally tanked as I realized that this is our normal now when we go to the mall not just a trial run here. Rick does not have the strength to walk from our apartment and through the mall any longer even with the help of his cane. Both he and I experienced a real eye opening time again.

The little girls were oblivious to our sadness and emotional time as they ran to and fro enjoying all the wonderful things the mall had to offer. One of the girls was pushing Rick. They squealed with glee as they spotted the custom jewellery shop and asked it they could go and check it out. We agreed wholeheartedly! In a split second off then went running into the shop. Meanwhile leaving poor grandpa sitting in his chair in the middle of the mall outside of the shop abandoned. Rick and I started laughing as they were so excited to shop that they forgot about him. I kept teasing him that it was a good thing I was there to pick up the slack! lol

Another revelation was trying to maneuver the chair in the food court full of people. Then Rick sitting at chair height trying to see the menu etc. He said he felt like a little kid...always looking upwards. And having to reach up to counter height to pay the cashier.

I thought I had our time all figured out and even had left extra time to get back to the apartment for my next appointment. As hard as I tried to move things along I kept meeting new obstacles in the process that I had not even thought about. The little girls were very helpful and trying desperately to help us along.

We ended up coming back with me pushing the chair as fast as I could manage and Rick loaded up like a pack mule with "stuff" on his lap, "stuff" hanging from the handles of the chair. It really looked quite the site that is for sure.

I can say I truly learned things the hard way on Saturday's excursion. By the time I got to my hair appointment, a good half hour late, I sat in the chair and basically had an emotional outburst. My poor hairdresser! I was emotionally and physically exhausted at this point.

All of us did survive and I know this is only one small little bitty episode in many to come. Rick keeps telling me soon this will all be the "good old days"!

Rick and Joan here...Check this out!!!

We just saw that our little grand daughter has set up her own ALS website for the May 23rd ALS Whitemouth Walk. All we could do is cry and cry when we read what she has written on her site. You can click on her site on the right hand side under Team Rick, Tatiana Kasowan or click on this link: http://www.als.ca/events/mysite.aspx?fid=2058

Let's put Tia over the top of her goal!

Joan here...Another first

We have had a very busy weekend. Getting settled in our apartment and all. The familiarity of the building has added an element of that "being home" feeling.

We attended our FIRST open house for the Brummitt-Feasby ALS House on Sunday. It is located right here in Winnipeg. It is a home that was donated to the ALS Society by two daughters who's step mother passed away from the disease. The home was extensively remodeled to meet the specific needs of the ALS person. The home has 4 fully serviced bedrooms and full time care staff to accommodate anyone staying there with the disease. They continue to operate this house through the fundraising efforts of everyone. You can check out this home at http://www.alsmb.ca/brummitt_feasby.aspx .

Our MB representative of the ALS Society, Diana Rasmussen, received national recognition and an award for her tireless work and dedication to the ALS Society. It is quite the achievement as she was recommended for the award from various other provinces as well. Diana was also the lady who first came to our home right after the diagnosis in Feb. to tell us what was all available to Rick and I. She gave us her phone numbers... including her cell if we should have any questions about anything. Just knowing that she was available to us at that time made us not feel so alone. It is because of people like Diana that people like us don't feel so lost at first.

As we toured this home, as beautiful as it was, our hearts sank within. Looking at all the power lifts, the beds, the chairs etc it was all a reminder to Rick and I what lies ahead. We almost felt like just tip toeing through the place as we didn't want to get to attached or planted there right now. We dreaded even going through the front doors initially. We were greeted with open arms. Two of my sisters and their husbands came with us for moral support! :) We were all treated graciously and welcomed into this new group of friends.

We met people with various stages of ALS, people who had recently lost loved ones, and people who are caregivers, and people who were there to support the caregivers. ALS does not just change the lives of the people who have it but of their families, friends, neighbours and on and on the list goes. We also heard from a gentleman who recently lost his wife to ALS. You could say I spent most of the time crying through it all. Every once in a while when I allow myself to go to that place in my thinking it just tears my heart. I can't even imagine what these people are going through right now. Their loss....their pain...their grief...their emotions are so tangible when you meet them.

My brother in law, who is a terrific Elvis tribute artist by the way, honoured us all by his impromptu singing for a lady with ALS. Needless to say he was a big hit!

Rick and I have enlargened our circle of friends as we walk this walk. We are meeting people who know about us from Whitemouth School who are coming up to us in various places here in Winnipeg to talk to us. We are beginning to feel like celebrities. :) Over two hundred kids and teachers know us but we may only know two or three of them right now! We look forward to getting to know all of them.

A Whitemouth update....cupboards are in, painting and flooring almost done! It looks great!!!

Rick & Joan here..."Kids say the darnest things!"

We did it! Had a great time with all the students and teachers at the Whitemouth School this morning at assembly. Today was the day that the kids rec'd their pledge sheets for the ALS Walk on May 23rd. They asked us to give a brief talk on ALS. It went great!

The kids were attentive and respectful. Many students came up to us afterwards expressing concern, care and thanks for us coming and talking to them. Same with the teachers.
It was a bit intimidating as the school covers grades one to twelve. So we were worried about being able to keep it pertinent to all.

Afterwards, we were invited to tour through some of the classes and hand out more information and take more questions. Got to share this one...in the main session Rick made a point of making sure the kids knew ALS is not a communicable disease. At least he thought he did! lol... Later in an individual class a young student around the age of 8 asked him the following...
"Is ALS a sexually transmitted disease?" I thought I was going to burst out laughing and was looking forward to how Rick was going to answer this one. But, to make it worse, remember Rick suffers from what he calls "farmer's ear". He is pretty deaf on one side. So he asked the student to please repeat the question. Which he did louder and clearer! As the teacher died a thousand deaths!!! Rick proceeded to answer the students question. Rick never missed a beat but boy I could hardly wait till we got out of ear shot. We collapsed in laughter!!! Rick said he could have turned that kid into a priest if he had answered differently. LOL

Anyhow, we did have a wonderful time and look forward to being at the school again. We feel that something very special happened there and that we may have an opportunity to really impact some young lives. Not to mention have a few laughs!!!

Joan here...Whew! Too much emotional stuff!!!

As I write this I am sitting in our new apartment. Most of our things are unpacked. We don't have a computer desk yet set up so I am sitting on my knees typing this off of an end table. The sun is shinning and it looks like it will be a beautiful day and it seems like we may have a bit of order to our life for the moment.

The last few days have been an incredible time of emotional highs and lows. We decided to move into the apartment the night before last. They say you get to know who you really are when the pressure is on. Well, I found out pretty quick that I can be not a very nice person when the heat is on!!! Rick and I had just left our house after a bunch of the kids and friends took the rest of the "stuff" away. It was late at night and we had a car load of things to get to the apartment. Rick is at a place where he can't lift anything with weight and I am not a whole lot better.

Our car was parked in the underground parking which meant we had to cross that and head for the elevators with the boxes and bins. One box at a time would have taken us hours so all that we could find to help us was a grocery cart. We filled the grocery cart full of the "stuff" and I started to push it. Poor Rick by this time was so exhausted himself. He could barely walk even with his cane. I looked at him barely walking and my cart full of "stuff" and that is when all the anger....frustration...and whatever you could call it hit! I felt like I was a bag lady with all this"stuff" in the cart and officially no home of our own. Talk about feeling sorry for myself. We were both so exhausted!

We got into the apartment and I slammed the box on a shelf in the storage closet and announced "I have had it and started crying!" So between the anger and the tears we ended up talking almost all night. Just what Rick needed no sleep!

I wish I could say that everything was better in the morning but it wasn't. We still had to head over to the house and pick up our telephone and cable box and return them. We knew this was going to be the last walk through our home with no one around. Our neighbour lady came over to say an official good bye as neighbours. We have become more than neighbours we have become friends! Not having her near is going to be hard!

We began the dreaded walk... we walked through our home room by room. Seeing all the rooms empty seemed so strange. We laughed and cried as we walked through the house and did all the remembering. We stood holding hands at the threshold of the door and prayed for the couple who would be moving in here. We are so happy it is them. Rick and I prayed for years and years of a house full of love, happiness and peace for them as they live in this place. We know how much we were blessed to have had this home together!

Next, was the yard....our hobby...our quiet place...our time of being together...Rick said he had a moment of epiphany one day after working for hours in the back yard with me. He realized he was "the gardener and that I was the garden decorator". He said it made his life so much easier to understand me after that! I was always getting him to move things around. He says big heavy things! when he was just trying to plant. He says we make quite a team.

As we walked around the yard, being true to myself, I began to notice all the things that needed yet to be done. As I rattled off all of the things Rick stopped and looked at me and said "Joan lets just stop and look at all the things that have been done and enjoy these moments!" Felt like a pail of cold water hit my face! I needed the reality check of taking a breath, stop running for a moment, and just breath in this moment forever into our hearts!

We very very slowly walked through the rest of the yard, looked into the now almost empty shed, the second shed that we had made up into a play house for the grand kids, the herb garden, up the side of the house, and closed the now rickety gate, and finally slowly got into the car. Rick slowly backed out of the driveway as we both waved good bye.

I have always heard of the saying "home is where the heart is". Rick and my heart is always in being together. Our home is now officially wherever we are together!